My husband took my daughter out of the house one sunny Saturday afternoon. I was sitting in the living room reading when I heard the biggest raccoon on earth on the roof. It was big, it was stomping, and it was moving rapidly across the roof. I ran out the front door into the middle of the lawn, looked up, and discovered my new-to-me boy on the roof. He had a sheet tied around his neck, his toes on the gutter, and his arms outstretched.
“Watch me, Danika!” said the boy. “I can fly!”
Unable to convince the child that he could not fly, I promised to take away his bike (read that “his freedom”) unless he would come down from the roof. The catch? He had to climb down a ladder. Not fly.
That’s when I knew. Boys are different than girls.
Raising Real Men
Hal and Melanie Young are well acquainted with that truth. The parents of eight children, they have six boys.
Let that sink in for a moment. Six. Boys.
(This was originally written in 2013).
It’s been years since my first boy tried to become Superman. He’s grown with a baby of his own. I have two more boys in the midst of their pre-teen years and, frankly, I could use some mentorship as I navigate this season again. Melanie has been a terrific source of wisdom for me personally through conversations online, so I was excited to read the book she and her husband Hal wrote: Raising Real Men (Great Waters Press, 2010).
If only I’d read Raising Real Men before that Saturday morning, I’d have known the house was too quiet! On page 25, Hal and Melanie write:
“Our focus must be on leading our sons into godly manhood, not just trying to manage them to make our lives convenient and more pleasant. Because undoubtedly it would be very convenient and pleasant if little boys would sit and color quietly like their sisters. Admit it. When the girls are quiet, all’s sweetness and light. When the boys are quiet, someone better check on them.“
Hal and Melanie Young wrote Raising Real Men in a friendly, conversational tone plenty of examples, explanations, and application. Their advice challenged me to consider how I parent and why, and I appreciated the wisdom they shared. At no point did I feel like they were advocating only one way of looking at an issue. I truly appreciated their frequent discussion of the Bible’s view on men.
The book is divided into two parts which discuss a number of subjects.
The first part of Raising Real Men deals with virtues:
- Heroes | The biblical view of heroes, how boys see them, where they find them, and healthy heroes for your boys.
- Adventure | The biblical view of adventure and recklessness, good reasons for boldness and adventure, and healthy risk-taking.
- Independence | Historical boyhood and our current culture, responsibility and freedom, gradual independence, and avoiding disaster.
- Weapons | The biblical view of violence, guidelines for pretend play, and real weaponry.
- Authority | The biblical view of leadership, discipline, obedience, and the path to servant leadership.
- Competition | The biblical view of competition, historical competition, competition and leadership, limits to competition, academics, lessons to be learned, and the gifted child.
- Boys in Real Life | Exercising what they’ve learned.
The second part of Raising Real Men covers training boys to live in community:
- The Most Important Stuff | What’s biblically most important to teach your boys, and how to teach it.
- Stewardship | Economics as it relates to daily decisions, tracking and planning spending, the working world, and planning for the future.
- Homeschooling Boys | Development, gender in learning, common issues, child resistance, goals, stress, and more.
- Chivalry | The biblical view of manners, social interaction, training, and chivalry in the outside world.
- Household Responsibilities | The biblical view of our roles, our culture, and critical tasks (also a whole lot of practical tips on raising some responsible, helpful men).
- Love, Marriage, and Everything Related | Navigating temptation and technology, teaching a biblical view, finding a wife, courtship, dating and other options.
- Launching Manhood | Manhood, steps toward manhood, becoming a provider, college and other options, types of colleges, strategies for college, the parent’s new roles.
The last section of Raising Real Men addresses a few common parenting concerns.
Raising Real Men is a helpful, biblical look at what it means to raise (and homeschool, if you choose) boys to be men who model the view of manhood outlined in Scripture. I highly recommend the book to all parents of boys. But you don’t have to take my word for it. Raising Real Men won the distinction of “2011 Book of the Year” from the Christian Small Publishers Association and is endorsed by twenty well-known men including pastors, authors, educators, a senator, a lawyer, and missionaries. Among the list of providing endorsements are names like Dr. Tedd Tripp, Dr. R.C. Sproul Jr., Chris Klicka and Kevin Swanson.
Purchase Raising Real Men
I want to thank Hal and Melanie Young for sending me a copy of Raising Real Men in return for my honest review.
If you’re itching to buy the book immediately, you may want to check out the deal you’ll get from Hal and Melanie Young. Not only will buying directly from them help support their speaking and writing ministry, you’ll also receive:
- A free .PDF download of the Raising Real Men Study Guide — free with every book purchase in any format.
- With every hard copy book purchased, receive a free two CD set of the first Sugar Creek Gang audio book, The Swamp Robber.
- Free Shipping
The book is available in ebook, paperback, or audiobook format.
Christian Book: Raising Real Men: Surviving, Teaching and Appreciating Boys
More Books by Hal and Melanie Young
Hal and Melanie Young are popular speakers on homeschooling and parenting. Their books are imminently practical.
Bible Resources for Your Kids
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Help Your Kids Learn and Love the Bible
You want your kids to learn and love the Bible.
You want to teach the Bible…
As parents, we deeply desire the best for our kids. We look for the right schools, we make them eat right and exercise, and we get them involved in extracurricular activities. We take our job as parents seriously.
But are we also putting our time and energy into
teaching them the Bible? Giving them the life-changing, soul-nourishing words of Scripture is not only doable, it’s an essential part of parenting kids for Jesus. And the good news is, studying God’s Word as a family doesn’t have to be difficult!
2 Timothy 2:15, ESV, says:
Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved,
a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth.
Our job, as parents who love Jesus, is to help our kids become approved workers, unashamed and rightly handling the word of truth.
The good news? Teaching the Bible isn’t hard. Your family can learn the Bible together.
…and you can!
A Crash Course in Teaching the Bible to Your Kids
Danika Cooley’s book, Help Your Kids Learn and Love the Bible, will give you the tools and confidence to study the Bible as a family. It will help you identify and overcome your objections and fears, give you a crash course in what the Bible is all about and how to teach it, and provide the guidance you need to set up a family Bible study habit.
You will finish this book feeling encouraged and empowered to initiate and strengthen your child’s relationship with the Lord through His Word.
Help Your Kids Learn and Love the Bible will equip you with everything you need to know to teach the Bible to your kids!
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Thank you for such a wonderful review, Danika! I’d like to invite you and your readers to join us at http://facebook.com/raisingrealmen too, where there is a great community discussing raising godly sons.
So appreciate your thoughts on our book!
Much love,
Melanie